


It Hurts Like Hell

by Bunsandpups



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Brotherly Love, Brothers, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-28
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-04-28 14:11:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5093660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bunsandpups/pseuds/Bunsandpups
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean finds something left by Sam after he leaps into the pit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It Hurts Like Hell

            Dean sorted through the box of things on the bed. He hadn’t noticed that Sam left them there before they’d gone off to the pit, to stop Lucifer from wreaking havoc on the world. Now, everything seemed incredibly empty. Where had his brother gotten these things?

            Another little green army man was on top of the box when Dean opened it. From there, he found old notes and drawings, some theories that never quite panned out, a few pictures or medals from when he and Sam were growing up, and the barest outline for a superhero comic Sam had started when he was still incredibly young. Dean couldn’t help but laugh at the terrible outlines and even worse dialogue.

            The note beside the box went untouched for a long time, because Dean couldn’t bear to open it. He finally decided it was time when he realized that everything left would be an even harsher reminder of their childhood and his loss. What he hadn’t examined was simply too painful to look at, and he knew it at a glance.

            He carefully unfolded the paper, noticing how Sam had neatly folded it into thirds. The creases were crisp and careful, like he’d decided this was the most important document in the world.

            _Dean, I’m gonna miss you. I know this is something I have to do. That doesn’t mean I have to like it, or that I’m gonna enjoy it. Remember all those times we went to the park as kids, and we would be excited to come home for dinner, and then disappointed because there was no one there to stay with us? It’s kinda the same now. I don’t know what it’ll be like in there, but I know I’ll miss you. I’m leaving you this box for a reason. It’s full of every earthly possession I have that still matters to me after all this time. There isn’t much there, and none of it’s really worth anything, but I want you to have it. Promise me you’ll remember it, and not just stuff it away somewhere. I don’t want you to be in pain, Dean, but I don’t want you to stuff me away and forget about me either. With love, your little brother Sammy._    

            Dean felt like he was going to be sick. How could Sam think he’d forget about him? Did Sam really think he was that replaceable? Tears pooled in Dean’s eyes, but he held them back, trying to be careful not to ruin the note or anything else Sam had left him.

            “I miss you like hell already, Sammy.” The words were mumbled and broken, and Dean could feel the sadness washing over him. For the first time in a long time since he began hunting, he felt true fear. He could deal with a lot of things, but how could he deal with his brother walking straight into hell?

**Author's Note:**

> The idea of losing someone that close is really scary to me, especially when you think about having to live without them. That's part of why I didn't go the typical "possession" route here (and because I already did that for the other October challenge I'm working on). I hope you enjoyed it!


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